Maybe a Fake Gintama Chapter 515: :Mastering the dating initiative is everything!
In a 100-yen second-hand store in Edo.
"Sa! Pick any you want! I can buy you whatever you want!" Jiang Cheng patted his chest and said to Yue Yong, who was standing outside the store behind him.
However, just after he finished speaking, Jiang Chengcheng sensed something was wrong, because Yueyong looked a little strange, with her head lowered, no expression on her face, and she never said a word.
"That..." Jiang Cheng, who was thinking of something, quickly explained, "Yueyue, you know, all my money is bought for games or taken by Kagura, such a store is already the limit! However, there is no distinction between high and low such as gifts! I always think so! Sa Sa, pick whatever you want, everything here is only 100 yuan! It's because you bought me this 20,000 yuan game Come on, I can let you choose two! This is the limit!"
After Jiang Cheng finished speaking, there was another half-minute silence.
"That," Jiang Cheng said with a hurried smile, "it's really the limit... Can you say something, I'm a little scared of you looking like this."
"Hmm..." Yueyong's mosquito-like voice sounded, and then she mechanically stepped into the door of the shop with hands and feet.
"Have you recently fallen in love with an idol group that dances mechanically?" Jiang Cheng said with a blank expression.
"Guest, how about this?" The store manager who was in his fifties and was about to become a boomerang was missing a front tooth and said, holding up a milky white chopstick, "This is this hundred yuan. The treasure of the store - engagement chopsticks... hairpin."
"Hey, did you say chopsticks just now? You obviously said chopsticks! It must be very hard to change your tongue temporarily!" Jiang Chengbai frantically complained.
"I can see this engagement hairpin... Chopsticks, this lady is really insightful. It has a lot of background." The boss with reading glasses forcibly shoved the chopsticks in his hands into Yueyong's hands.
"Hey, why did you change it back!" Jiang Chengbai spit out, "What are engagement chopsticks? I've never heard of that kind of thing! And aren't all chopsticks paired? Why is this only one!"
"There is a reason for this," the shop owner sighed softly, shook his head and explained in a deep voice, "This chopstick, once Toyotomi Hideyoshi wanted to warm Nobunaga's feet in the cold winter, in order to be able to make A microwave oven that can heat straw sandals, and chopsticks for eating hot pot in the morning in winter. And the other chopstick has been thrown away because it fell into the hot pot."
"It's not related at all! Why do you eat hot pot in the morning? Why a microwave oven?" Jiang Chengbai shouted, "In other words, if you have hot pot, you don't have to warm your feet for Nobunaga anymore, right? Just invite him directly. Wouldn't it be better to eat hot pot? After eating, your whole body will be warmed up!"
"Ah, I actually remembered it wrong," the store manager pushed the glasses on his face and continued, "This chopstick was actually burned by Zhuge Liang and others on the shore while admiring the river during the Battle of Chibi. boats, listening to the cries of Cao Cao's soldiers for help, while eating the chopsticks used in the hot pot."
"Don't think that making up this kind of story will make it appreciate! It's just useless chopsticks! And there's only one!"
"Anyway, our store has a discount right now, and you can get this engagement chopstick for only 1,000 yuan." The store owner ignored Jiang Cheng's words, and continued, "If you add another 100 yuan, I will make the hot pot in person. The other chopstick in the middle is picked up, rinsed and given to you."
"Is it you who dropped the chopsticks into the hot pot?!" Jiang Chengbai complained angrily, "Are these chopsticks just the ones you use to eat hot pot?! Why do you want a thousand yuan? Do you think I'm an idiot?! Give me a discount, just two fifty yuan!"
"Guest, you've bargained too hard, you can get a maximum discount of 50%." The store owner replied, "But it's only responsible for scooping out, and no washing service is provided."
"Ten yuan, wash me with disinfectant!" Jiang Cheng said sternly.
"Three hundred yuan! Give me a pair of... No, Nobunaga's rotten straw sandals!" The shop owner didn't give in at all.
"Five yuan! Give me your straw sandals and flush them down the toilet! Immediately!"
"One hundred yuan! It's the limit! At most, I can give you another piece of antique loincloth that I... Cao Cao has not changed for 30 years!"
"No loincloths, fifty yuan is my last bottom line!" Jiang Cheng's expression became solemn, "Otherwise we... will go to the next one, as far as I know, the hundred-yen store in Edo can be Not just your family~”
"You kid!" The shop owner frowned, with an unbearable look on his face, "I can't help it, it's all about this, okay!"
……
Four o'clock in the afternoon, on the way back to Yoshihara.
"That, is it really okay?" Jiang Cheng asked Yueyong, who kept his head down and kept silent, "The dirty old man used to be sterilized and still smelled of old age. Are chopsticks really okay? If you don't like it, you can throw it away, and you might catch some virus if you use that kind of chopsticks."
"Yes...but...you can." Yueyong lowered her head and replied in a low voice.
"Well, wait a moment for me," Jiang Cheng, who suddenly noticed something, stopped, turned and walked to the other side, "I'll be back soon."
Three minutes later, Jiang Cheng came to Yueyong with an octopus ball in his hand, and handed the lunch box to Yueyong.
"Eat, even if it's just compensation." Jiang Cheng said casually.
"Oh... um." Yueyong took the lunch box from Jiang Cheng's hand, and then asked in a low voice, "How...how...how...how about?"
"What?" Jiang Cheng looked at Yueyong suspiciously.
"Chopsticks... no, how about the hairpin?"
At this time, Jiang Chengcai discovered that Yueyong had tied the two chopsticks on her head as hairpins.
"Very good." Jiang Cheng replied casually.
【About...Date! This is dating! 】Yue Yong lowered his head and thought to himself as he walked, 【This is the date that Sun Rin talked about when he had breakfast today! Men and women go shopping together, give each other gifts, and eat together! Next up is... watching a movie, and...]
Thinking of this, Yueyong raised her head and looked at Jiang Cheng in disbelief, [This man... what happened today? ! Does he...really...really want to do that to me? ! How to do how to do? ! What should be done in this situation? ! ]
"Oh! Today, there is a re-screening of "Transformers" one or two! Watching the two together, it costs only 150 yuan and also gives popcorn and a big glass of Coke!" Suddenly I saw a post from an old movie theater on the side of the road. Jiang Cheng, who came up with the poster, was instantly attracted, then turned his head and shouted excitedly, "Yueyue! Can I go back later today? Can I watch this?!"
【Late... go back later! This man, today...do you really have that kind of plan today? ! 】Yue Yong's pupils shrank suddenly, looking at Jiang Cheng in disbelief.
"Yes." Yueyong replied lightly, but there was a different scene in his heart, 【You can be tall! Am I an idiot? ! Why did you say that! I'm obviously not ready yet! ]
……
This dilapidated movie theater has only one screening hall, and it is very old. The staff...except for the little gangster at the door who is chewing gum and selling tickets, who seems to have no motivation and courtesy. nobody else.
The floor of the auditorium is also full of all kinds of littering garbage, and there are even a few waste people who can be called garbage sleeping on the seats.
"Yo, little brother, come to the movies too!" Hasegawa, holding a wine bottle, greeted Jiang Cheng.
"The little brother who gave me wine last time, Saxi ignored me." Uncle Musashi, who was also sitting on a certain seat holding a bottle of wine, shouted to Jiang Cheng drunkenly.
"That..." Jiang Cheng, who sat down at a certain seat with coke and popcorn, asked Yueyong, who was standing beside him, with a blank expression. "Why did you come along too? Do you... like robots too?"
"Hmm... um." Yue Yong, who was completely immersed in her own world, bowed her head and shrugged in response.
"Really?! Do you like robots too?!" Jiang Cheng was surprised, "I didn't show it before! Then, just keep quiet and watch movies! The first two are my favorites. it!”
"Hmm..." Yueyong, who couldn't hear what Jiang Cheng was saying, replied again.
……
At ten o'clock in the evening, Jiang Cheng wiped his tears and walked out of the movie theater. Behind him was Yueyong, who bowed his head and said nothing.
"Too...too moving!" Jiang Cheng shouted with tears in his eyes, "Even in such a dirty and disgusting movie theater, it's still touching! Romance! Huge shape-shifting robot no matter what. Time is a man’s romance! Yueyue, you understand, right?! If you also like robots, you should understand?!”
"Uh... um." Yue Yong responded again.
"Well, I always feel that something is wrong with you today." Jiang Cheng asked suspiciously, "There are few surprises today, does it really matter? Is it because of your physical discomfort? Do you want to take a break before going back? ?"
【Rest! This is it! Sun Wheel said it this morning! Men usually use this reason to trick women into that kind of place when dating, and then move on to the next step! 】Yueyong thought to himself, 【Oops! In this case...]
"Then...let's take a break..." Yueyong lowered her head and whispered back.
【What am I talking about! If you do that kind of thing with a man like that, you're done! Not only... but life is over! 】 Yueyong scolded herself for not being able to live up to her expectations.
"You...couldn't it be...that one is coming?" Jiang Cheng approached, pinching his chin and looking at Yueyong's face suspiciously.
【Is this...a confirmation of what? ! Always thought this man was... a vegetarian, but turned out to be a carnivore? ! The situation has become more and more passive, and if it continues like this, he may really take the initiative! no! I'm... going to fight back! At least, I want to master the last initiative! ]
"Monthly?"
"I'm fine, but it's you, you won't fall asleep suddenly, right?" Yue Yong glanced at Jiang Cheng lightly, and said coldly.
"Huh? Why do I have to sleep? Today is not the middle of the month." Jiang Cheng showed a strange expression on his face.
【Parried! This man... can't be underestimated! In other words, this man thought he had the initiative all day today, so he could take the initiative to the end as a matter of course! horrible! This man is really scary! I've never seen him like this before! Was it hidden by him? ! But, I can't lose! Absolutely can't lose! The best coping strategy at this time is...]
"Don't think about it too much, I'm just worried that Nite, who stays in the room every day and plays games, can't keep up with his physical strength." Yueyong pinched the cigarette stick and turned her face away with a look of disdain.
"Ha?! Who are you underestimating? Do you think I'll get tired after walking a few steps? I'm not a kid." Jiang Cheng folded his hands and snorted, annoyed.
【Not even an inch! ! 】Yueyong's whole person is not well, thinking in his heart, 【This man...】
"Why don't you talk again?" Jiang Cheng asked suspiciously, "Ah, no, you are really weird today, what the **** is wrong with you? Are you upset with me? I bought you something like that. Are you returning the gift? It has nothing to do with me? If you don't like it, you should say it at the time, and I will compensate you all? Isn't that little ball just compensation? Why..."
[Well, forget it, facing such a man, I can't stand it at all... So far, there is only one way...]
Thinking, Yueyong took out several kunai from her body, and before Jiang Cheng could react, she stabbed them all on Jiang Cheng's head.
"Okay, that's it. Your condition is really bad today." With that, Yueyong dragged the collar of Jiang Cheng, who was lying on the ground, rolled his eyes and was still twitching, and started He walked in the direction of Yoshihara.
"Have I...did anything bad?" Jiang Cheng, who was already unconscious, murmured, "Why...why do you treat me like this..."
……
The next morning, Yoshihara.
Jiang Cheng, with a thick bandage wrapped around his head, sat at the dining table and stared at Yue Yong opposite.
"Hey, can you explain it now? Why did you do that to me yesterday? I just passed out because of the blood loss."
"It's just that you're unhappy." Yueyong, who was chewing slowly, replied lightly.
In an instant, several blue veins appeared on Jiang Cheng's face, "Ha?! What do you mean by being upset?! I'm also upset! I'm also upset when someone pierces my head with holes! Do you want to fight? ?! Asshole! Ah!"
"Be quiet while eating~IndoMTL.com~ A scumbag who's not in good shape."
"Although I don't know what it means, I do feel the contempt in your words..." The blue veins on Jiang Cheng's forehead seemed to burst out, "Hey, stinky woman, I will never bear you again today. …”
Before Jiang Cheng finished speaking, a few more kunai were hit on his forehead.
"I'm full." After speaking softly, Yueyong got up and dragged the back collar of Jiang Cheng, who was lying on the table and rolled his eyes because of Kunai, turned and walked towards the door. , "We're on patrol."
"They...every day, every day." Qingta pouted silently.
"Yes, but maybe for that child, this way of getting along is more accustomed. Of course. For that man, too."
Sun Wheel smiled and replied, and then turned to look at the back of Yueyong, who had already walked away. I saw that there were two more milky white hairpins on Yueyong's head, which were used as hairpins and were cleaned very well. Clean chopsticks...